Healing from Trauma

Hello, and welcome back to another blog with Morty! Today I wanted to start off the Blog with a quote that caught my attention: “There is no time stamp on trauma. There isn’t a formula that you can just insert yourself into to get from horror to healed. Be patient. Take up space. Let your journey be the balm.” – Dawn Serra I came across this quote as I was doing my morning scrolls through social media on my phone. Trust me, some days I question why I even go on social media in general. But then there are days like today where I’m glad that I did. I don’t know what works for you, but for me, I like to believe that my higher power from time to time will send me messages through either people, experiences, dreams, energy etc. Today, it was done through a quote. In today’s blog, I want to talk about my experience with being patient and letting my journey unfold as I go. Why do I want to talk about those two things? Well, let’s just say they go hand in hand with each other. Specially in recovery. As a survivor of HT, I left a life where everything was chaotic, nothing was free and in certain situations, I was in control. To then moving cities and living a life where everything felt very slow-paced, all you hear is “trust the process” and I had to let people help me and let go of wanting to control everything. When I tell you that hearing “trust the process” made whatever I was feeling even worse, oh it did. I remember there were days when I would be angry, frustrated and constantly restless. Patience is something I’ve always struggled with. Whether it’s waiting in line at a grocery store or in this case waiting to finally heal from basically everything in my life that has caused me trouble. So little did I know that healing from trauma, recovering from an addictive brain and compulsive behaviour was not gonna happen overnight. For someone to succeed in doing so, it’ll take time, patience and trust. That’s where today’s quote comes in when it says to be patient, and let your journey be the balm. How do I do that you may be asking? Well, I simply trust the process. I’m laughing as I write this because it’s funny how it used to be something I disliked hearing, to now saying it myself every single day when I wake up. I say it every day because even when I’m having a really good day, I still question why my life happened the way it did and why I’m still here at SHH. Just imagine when I’m having a bad day, the thoughts that I get if I still get those thoughts, even when it’s a good day. But hey, no matter if it’s a good day or a bad day, I circle back to my “why” and I let things unfold as I go through this journey and it’s just getting started. I have experienced a lot of change during my time here at SHH. All positive, but we obviously all deal with change differently and that’s okay. I have a lot to be grateful for. A lot of the things that I’m grateful for today are things that I’ve needed to be very patient about. Things that felt so so SO far away that I never thought I would be able to have or experience. The second phase of programming here at SHH has offered me so many different ways to prepare myself to transition to independence eventually. I’m really thankful for that because I’m feeling more comfortable every day with the idea of becoming an independent woman. It’s very tailored to what I need and I’m also very happy with my current situation, I’m still not quite sure if I’m able to share it all completely yet, but maybe it’ll be in next week’s blog. So stay tuned! Till next time, Morty